Sir, Have you no sense of decency...

I really wanted this gig to work out for ole Diamond Dave, but it looks like the bell ringer is being awaken from his slumber and handed a piece of paper with Dave's name on it. That's too bad.

Next stop, MTV's the Surreal Life. It's worthy of note for those unfamiliar with the show, that this season stars Poison's CC Deville who quite remarkably is the most sane component to the current cast. If Dave does elect to do the show, they'll have to dig deep to create a situation where he's the most sane house member. I'd say the only way they could make that happen is if they cast his former bandmate, Eddie Van Halen along side him. Eddie is without a doubt MORE insane than Dave.

Here's a simply request, Take some Prozac, find a studio that has enough isolation booths so each guy gets one, rehearse VH ablums one through four, get individual tour buses for each band member, hit the road and put an end to all this foolishness.