What Tony was driving to work:
What Tony now drives to work:
AP - Peachtree City GA – The apocalypse is finally upon us. Gas prices have become so outrageous that Tony Alva has had to take severe measures in an attempt to offset the tripling costs of his daily commute to work. “I’ve always driven smaller sporty types my whole life”, Tony exclaimed, “and the decent gas mileage I got was always a byproduct of the smaller more efficient models I’ve owned, but with things the way they are now I’ve had to dig deeper into the Al Gore well”. Mr. Alva went on to exclaim that his worst fear is actually being considered cool by Al Gore and will more than likely elect to wear a paper bag over his head during his drive from Peachtree City to the heart of mid-town Atlanta.
When asked for comment from his family, most mocked, but were supportive of the measure. “While pulling the car out of the drive way, my Father motioned for me to roll down the window. He snickered as I discovered the car lacks even the simplest creature comforts like power windows”, Tony added.
Mr. Alva went on to comment that he’ll be more than happy to bump along in his little beer can car until the government wises up and get serious about divorcing our country from Arab oil, but drilling in ANWR and the Gulf of Mexico will be a necessary step. “Let’s get to drillin’ tomorrow” he was heard to mutter as he slid into the little sneaker car.
Mrs. Alva's reaction was coy, if not a bit elated since Tony's regular car will be availalble for her to toodle around in while their 6 year-old daughter is in school. "It sucks that Tony has to do this, but on the other hand, look how HOT I look driving his car!" she said as she tore out of the drive way to get her nails done.