Alva's endorsement of McCain sidelines Romney...

Atlanta GA - Following uber blogger Tony Alva’s recent public endorsement of Arizona Senator John McCain on his Intravenus DeMilo blog, Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney has announced he would be suspending his campaign. “After Mr. Alva weighed in, I knew it was time to bow out”, the veteran GOP candidate said. “The flip flopping I was having to do, along with my corporate ass kissing, was beginning to give me a headache. At least now I can go get a drink and chill at my favorite strip club!” he went on to comment. Word from his campaign manager was that the Governor placed a call to fellow GOP candidate Mike Huckabee to give him the news and urge “God’s candidate” to hang up his cleats as well. Inside sources close to Romney said that the Gov. told the candidate from Arkansas during their brief phone call, “I don’t think the God thing is going to win it for us this year Mike, and I doubt you’d have a snowball’s chance in H-E-double toothpicks getting Tony’s endorsement”. Calls into Mr. Alva for comment revealed the truth in that statement. “As Mr. Alva has stated, the days of pandering to the religious nutjobs within the GOP ranks are over” an Alva spokesperson said.

Gov. Romney has not yet announced which candidate he will endorse.